The Lone Twin Network is a voluntary support group run by and for twinless twins, over the age of 18, whose loss has occurred at or around birth, in childhood or during adulthood.

We are a UK based group but also have many members from all over the world.

Through meetings and personal contact, we aim to offer a friendly and comfortable environment in which to talk openly and honestly about how it feels to be without your twin. You will find there is a wide variety of experiences and circumstances of loss within the members of the group – please remember, you are not alone.

Update: August 2020 – In recent years it has become increasingly difficult and emotionally heartbreaking to turn away lone twins whose twin had died in utero. For the past year or so we considered admitting lone twins into the Network if their twin had died in the last trimester of pregnancy; this did not work as in many cases the surviving twin did not know when the loss occurred and even if they did it was unfair to draw a line that decreed that at 185 days you could not become a member of The Lone Twin Network but at 186 days you could. It was therefore decided at the last committee meeting that any surviving twin who was over the age of 18 could be eligible for membership if they had lost their twin at any stage in utero or later in life.

As we come to know each other through the meetings and network list, we will find mutual support. Some may wish to examine ways of increasing awareness of this profound and unique loss, so that those affected – both lone twins and those related to them – will be able to cope more easily and with greater understanding. We endeavour to help ease the pain of loss and loneliness that we all feel in some way, during our journey through this particular grief.

The network list is the means by which members can make contact with one another as soon as they join the Network. As well as the name and general location, it gives details of the sex of their twin, whether or not they were identical and the age at which their twin died. Additional space is provided for other information which surviving twins may wish to add. Any twin wishing to contact another is free to do so, but there is no obligation for members to participate in ways other than those they have chosen. For example, email addresses or telephone numbers need not be included in the Network list.

Origins of the Network

Between 1983 and 1986, 219 lone twins replied to an invitation from Joan Woodward, herself a lone twin. to participate in her research project into the response of twins to the death of their twin. The findings were presented at the 1988 International Conference of Twin Studies in Amsterdam and subsequently published in their journal. On February 25 1989, at Queen Charlotte’s Hospital, London, 31 of the lone twins originally interviewed by Joan met together for the first time and found they had a great deal to share with one another. It was a momentous day.

Those present divided into four groups; those whose twin had died at or around the time of birth; members whose twin had died in childhood and those whose twin had died in adult life. A separate group was formed for those whose twin had died in traumatic circumstances. After this initial meeting, Joan Woodward offered to compile a Register of Lone twins. As membership grew, the ‘Lone Twin Network’ was formed, and has continued to evolve to meet the needs of those who have experienced twin bereavement. There are currently over 650 members in the network.

Be Part of Lone Twin Network on Facebook

Members have the opportunity to interact with other Lone Twin Network members in a confidential Facebook group. Once your LTN membership is confirmed, we’ll invite you to join the group. Please note, because of the personal nature of the issues discussed by members, we only offer this opportunity to LTN members and we won’t be able to accept anyone into the Facebook LTN Group membership until we know you via joining the LTN core group.

105 thoughts on “About

  1. my twin died before i was born (wee don’t know its gender). And my parents told me when i was about 9 and well even before that i felt like part of me was missing but i didn’t know why and now i know why. And well my parnts dont talked about them alote and it’s just like “miscariges happen” but for me its harder than that. And espeacialy lately its been hard for me and i always feel like im not full.

    • Hi Isabella,
      Good for you for reaching out for some help! This is the right place. Sorrow shared is diminished;joy shared is increased.
      My heart goes out to you. By coincidence, my daughter’s name is Isabel btw.
      My twin Claudette drowned when we were three years old. It was just a stupid misadventure we both were in. After that I secretly was looking for her… Even running into a mirror when I thought I saw her! It was dark/twilight at the time. What I took to be her joy at seeing me was just me perking up with the most profound relief when I “finally found” her! Intellectually I know she is gone but still, still… I’ll always be looking for her. Crazy as that sounds.
      I do take some comfort because my daughter’s middle name was my twin’s name.
      Claude, Twin to Claudette 19 61–19 64

  2. My twin brother died I day after birth the hospital fault doctor and midwife struck off think of him always it’s as though part of me is missing

    • Hello I know how that feels I lost my identical twin sister a few hours after I was born .my family dontb talk about it .I can’t even visit a proper grave .I have suffered with depression all my life as it has felt like half of me is missing I always sought close friendships to fill the void but its still there .

  3. I lost contact with my twin around 10 years ago but I never felt alone. A short while ago I suddenly felt utter loneliness like I never felt before. I feel like I have been locked in a hyperbaric chamber since. I started to think the worst but I found out I was right. My twin died. I know that I am supposed to continue and all the other crap people say, but this lack of whatever this is that allows me to feel that isn’t there any more. I am not suicidal. I just wish I could feel anything, I don’t even feel physical pain. As a mechanic, that is not good.

    • I know exactly how you feel . I had not talked to my twin for a while she died 9 weeks ago . I did feel her die . I have no guilt I hadn’t seen her . I take her lots of flowers to her grave and talk to her . You don’t have to feel anything. My granddaughter is 21 on Wednesday I did get a bit upset thinking about she won’t see her .

    • I know the feeling. My twin brother was an addict and the last decade we only saw each other a few times. He died a few years ago and part of me died. No feeling. Our birthday is coming up and no one understands..I don’t do birthdays any more.

  4. My twin brother was assaulted in June and died of his injuries a month later. We are 68. He was the sweetest man and never would have hurt anyone. I cry every day sometimes several times A-day. I wanted us to spend our old age together takeing care of each other. I can hardly look at his picture without weeping..

    • Ah soo sorry Carolyn, lost my Conjoined twin 5 years ago.Still bad, try to remember how she would have liked me to live. Cherish each moment.
      Best regards

    • Bless you . I know how it feels I lost my twin sister 8th of September. Yes it is very hard I am always going to her grave Chris was 61 . I thought we would grow old together but it’s not yo be

  5. I have just lost my twin sister 3 weeks ago aged 61 . I too am finding it hard . I am very sad when I am at work . I have been to the grave several times . It will be our birthday on the 24th of this month . The first one on my own .

    • Hi Barbara, I’m so extremely saddened and sorry for your loss, my beautiful kind loving twin sister Dorise passed away on the 28th July this year after a courageous two year battle with cancer – she was 65 years old. I am overwhelmingly heartbroken at her loss from my life, this is something I will never get over. I know we can both empathise over our loss. We both could do with a big hug so I am sending you one. You are in my thoughts and prayers. God bless. Patricia xxxx ❤️❤️❤️

      • Thank you for your reply . I went to the dentist today and I went to see her grave as it’s a quicker way to get there . I shall get her some flowers for Saturday. I am so sorry for your loss also . It’s hard been on your own without a twin . I have had a few white feathers since she has passed . Have you had any feathers. . Xxxx🥰🥰🥰

    • This is the first Xmas without my twin. God bless you Mike. God I’m lonely. I really feel for you Barbara. Be strong as your sister would want you to be.

  6. I lost my twin sister June 20th of this yr.
    I am having a hard time I need to talk to other twins who lost their twin. I’m struggling & I don’t know what to do…

      • Oh my God. I choked up just reading that. Please know that even though I am sure you feel very alone we areWe are here for you. You are not the only one. Much love. Claude – Twin to Claudette

      • Hi Nick,
        We would love to help you. Please can you send us a quick message through the Contact Us page and we can send you details on how to join and so to get support.
        Kind regards,

      • Hi, i really feel for you. I lost my identical twin sister 6 yrs ago. At age 65. I still miss her so much. But i found it helps to keep a little sort of trasure chest, with pics of her, shells, little mementoes. I write little notes and put them in too. Just remember, your twin walks beside you always xx

      • Perdi meu irmao gemeo no natal de 2019
        Dia 17 de junho sonhei com ele e é muito raro eu conseguir sonhar com ele e lembrar porque tomava remedio de dormi.No sonho ele me avisou que eu estava gravida e comprovei com o teste de sangue.
        A conexao que gemeos é sobrenatural
        Nao estamos fisicamente juntos porem espiritualmente o sinto o tempo todo ao meu lado.

    • I have just lost my twin sister 3 weeks ago aged 61 . I too am finding it hard . I am very sad when I am at work . I have been to the grave several times . It will be our birthday on the 24th of this month . The first one on my own .

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  8. Becky died February 25, 2019and it feels like it was this morning. Its horrific. The pain never goes sway. I’m sorry for your loss. I really am. I wish I had more time with Becky. I do cherish every moment spent with my twin as I’m sure you do too. It took me 3 hours to go through mine andbeckys texts from 2-25-19 to 11-8-18. I was accused of having an affair because she and I messaged so much. Please keep your head up and I’m here if you need me. I can understand except you have 20 years on me and becky

  9. My name is Jessica. My identical twin, Rebbecca, passed away 2-25-19 and that’s when I died,too. My family has told me they dont know what to say so they dont day anything at all or it’s time to “Get over it, get through it, get on with it” . Every single family member has either stopped talking to me or put me down saying ” I’m selfish and I need to let others grieve like Becky’s husband, he lost his spouse”. Wait, what? How can they even say that to me? He killed her emotionally and through stressing her out to the point her heart actually quit. I fought her leaving me all night the night she passed. I actually beat my husbnad up in our sleep to the point he had knots on his head! Omg!
    A week before she passed I had a dream I was sentenced to the electric chair and when I finally gave in to completing this horrific death sentence, it was the easiest thing I’ve ever done. Becky’s catsent me TIM McGraw’s ” live like you were dying” song a week before she died.
    So much to say to tell my story but to keep it readable I must say I havent felt any better than the day she left me here, alone. In fact, a psychic told me Becky Rashad to jump me to safety life because my pit of despair has been so deep it’s almost killed me many times. I believe this because my father had to grab onto me the day Becky died and tell me “you’re not going anywhere!: he has spent cou less hours with me in my room and on the phone with our mom, to make sure I was going to survive the manic episodes I endured for so long.
    Anyways, please, if you think I am capable of handling another twinless twin, lone twin, and all that it entails, please, contact me.im not hard to find. I need help, too. Substancesdont helpand my depression has gotten extremely severe to the point I’ve been kicked out of psy history offices.please help

  10. Hello, my twin brother died at 1 year old, he was born with learning difficulties and eventually died of pneumonia, im 23 now and i am still trying to fill this void i have in my life, no matter what i do, i cant get rid of the lonliness and its starting to get a bit much for me, i live a happy life and i am extremely outgoing but i still struggle when im by myself, its as if im missing someone or something that doesnt exist. I visit his grave but doesnt really help. any information would be greatly appreciated and im more than happy to speak to anyone that is needing a little help too. 🙂 Cheers,

    Ben Miller – Scotland

  11. I am a lone twin, just got back from the funeral of my identical Twin Mike, it seems very strange alone. Very Very Sad.

    • I also lost my twin this year, this quarantine only worsens my grief because there are few ways to destroy the mind .. everything is very difficult

      • Hi, just wanted to say soo sorry, understand all your losses. Even if its 1 day, or at bith, still devastating. I lost my identical twin 5 years ago, with sepsis. She was 65. What a waste!! We were conjoined twins, and i always thought we would die together. Im now 70, and i feel her every day. She walks beside me. Dont give up, make the best of each day. Especially now. Have fun, find positives, remember your twin is watching you

      • Ah soo sorry. Just remember tour twin walks beside you. Whatever the age of your loss, stay positive. Im a 70 year old conjoined twin, lost my twin 5 years ago. I thought we would die together. She had sepis, and did within 24 hours. Especially now, try to be positive and find joy in little things.

  12. I lost my twin sister on 8th February 2020 with undiagnosed leukaemia she passed away within. 12 hours I was with her but I am totally devastated- I am lost without her so is her husband and 3 daughters. We are 62. Funeral is on 28th. Coroner inquest insitu

      • I have just lost my twin sister. Three weeks ago . I didn’t think it would be this hard but it is . I felt her die that night which I have found very hard . We were not identical twins . Very different we were . But still she has left a big hole . We were only 61

    • Becky died February 25, 2019and it feels like it was this morning. Its horrific. The pain never goes sway. I’m sorry for your loss. I really am. I wish I had more time with Becky. I do cherish every moment spent with my twin as I’m sure you do too. It took me 3 hours to go through mine andbeckys texts from 2-25-19 to 11-8-18. I was accused of having an affair because she and I messaged so much. Please keep your head up and I’m here if you need me. I can understand except you have 20 years on me and becky

  13. A éramos Breno que Deus esta com ele
    E eu sou Brena … compartilhamos nossas vidas por 26 anos onde nunca brigamos .
    Hoje me sinto como um peso de dor ou alegria onde todos olham para mim e lembra dele principalmente minha mae.. a qual tento fortificar mais nao consigo . To com turbilhão de sentimentos .Breno acidento de moto indo para a festa de Natal

  14. Perdi meu irmao gemeo na véspera do natal agora 24/12/2019 , eu era a pessoa que mais amava o natal e agora meu coração esta partido , sinto o tempo todo que eu quem deveria ter partido, e não sei como vou lidar agora sem ele..éramos sempre unidos eu sentia o que ele sentia, adoecíamos juntos, alegres, depressão tudo que ele pensava eu sentia e vice versa…só não me mato porque sei que meu maninho esta no céu e ele quero me reencontrar. Gosto de falar com quem é gemeo porque entendemos os que é ser especial.

  15. Hello,
    I am a twin. I have known my whole life as my family didn’t keep it from me. My twin died when my mom was 6 months pregnant I believe. Then she was put on bed rest until I was delivered. I have always looked for someone to be close with. I am married but even that doesn’t feel close enough. Some in my family accused me of using Rebecca as a crutch so I’ve always pushed to be on my own. I have always struggled with my weight and my identity of who I am supposed to be. As an adult I will be overcome with a need to cry frequently but it doesn’t keep me from working. I havent been diagnosed with depression or anxiety. I recognize the feelings but try to act “normal” whatever that word means. Thank you for letting me share.

    • hi am aoifenna twin to aoivanna
      lost my twin 5th month never knew till like 3 years ago before that I thought my younger sis was mmmy twin cause every where we went people always said we were twins and I would say no in a joking but serious manner
      I still miss her and I cant explain to people that I knew her but she was never born though I talk to her like she was there
      I gave us both our names since my parents didn’t tell me till like 3 years ago but I always felt that void that’s why I protected my lil sis like she was gonna ;eave me its know I understand
      I really don’t know what to do
      aoifenna and aoivanna twins forever

  16. Hi
    I lost my twin on December 6th,2018
    We are 74 but only lived together for the first two years of our lives, being adopted by our mother’s brother’s families. Our mother died,aged 37;our father had Parkinson’s so was unable look after us twins and our elder sister- he died when we were 8years old but we had no contact with him after we’d been adopted. During our childhood we lived apart my sister twin in CoVentry and myself in Aberystwyth. We managed to see each other for about 4hours each year. Latterly we have seen each other much more and grown so close.
    I now feel a bit like a 3 legged dog.
    Very strange.. very angry at times as she basically gave up.
    We will be 75 this Saturday- 23rd.
    I will survive but though I’ve lost people before this feels very different.
    I just thought you might appreciate a slightly different angle on the’lone twin’ situation.
    Dave Piears

  17. Hello,
    I am a lone twin who lost her identical twin at age 2. I ended up being an only child with no other sibling. I have felt so lonely all my life and I have missed my twin so so much. I feel so depressed each time I imagine how my life would have been if she hadn’t died and left me all alone. I really to talk to someone who would understand how I truly feel.

    • Hi Amaka, I really understand how you feel. Even though I lost my twin 4 years ago at age 65, the feeling is the same. I feel that you have to live for two of you. To kind of fill that space!! Live , laugh, enjoy for both you and your twin. She or he will always walk beside you, be positive.

  18. I lost my twin at birth. I was never given the details and have no idea where she could be buried. It has pained me my whole life. I want even told I was a twin until I was about 9 years old. Maybe this lost is why I dont like to be alone, always feeling lonely.

    • I understand how you are feeling, I feel exactly the same, luckily I found where my twin brother is buried after some research. The local burial and cemetery dept are very helpful if you have any information.
      I feel half a person all the time and wonder what if, as well. It’s s weird feeling x

    • Yes my condition also same as you llike. We both born in the earth. But after birth of 3 days,
      One of my partner in woobs died,Now i’m 22, still I’m thinking her.. she gave live but she died…it’s kills me lot when I’m thinking her. .

      I want to share more with you
      Please mail me

      Awaiting for your mail

    • Hello. I understand how you feel. I lost my identical twin at birth, too. I miss him very much and all of my life I have felt lonely and empty. I also have no idea where he was buried and it is so sad that I cannot even visit him. Last November I got a little tattoo that symbolises our bond, sometimes I just put my hand gently over this tattoo and think that he is always with me

      • Hello Jack I too have lived my whole life knowing my identical twin elaine died but have no idea where she was buried. 😦 a tattoo is such a nice idea. Thank you. I wonder if shes my angel. And will I see her again. I have delt with feeling my whole life that someone is missing.

  19. Hi, I lost my identical twin by miscarriage at three weeks of pregnancy. I’ll delighted to communicate with anybody sharing this.

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